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Janky Cracka Fool


"You see dem shoes you got on. If I can guess where you got dem shoes, you give me five bucks."
"OK sah, you got dem shoes... right at the end of yo feet!"
"Now hand ova da money."

Shoeman hustled his way around Louisiana with this trick in the eighties before the Feds wised up to his simple syntactic scam.

Using these skills he ended up a Tory speech writer in Thatcher's times, where "we will keep the mines open at all costs", meant "we will shut the mines at all costs".

Three years of "Find the Lady" on Oxford Street followed by short spells in water filters and gold broking almost broke him.

Fortunately his heavy untaxed profits on Bourbon Street allowed him at last to go legit.

He now advises Ed Milliband on his speech impediment and Janky on life in general.
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